Hello everyone. In the last week to a week in a half, my family has felt a sadness that I don't think we've ever really experienced before. At least, I know I've never felt such a sorrow as this and it is difficult to express it in a way that I wouldn't be offending or something.
Um... our good friend Brian, who is more like a brother to me and my brothers and another son to my parents, has a friend (as far as I know still has) that is fighting a huge war against Cancer. She went into a coma because of it, and is now fighting for her life, as far as I know. She had come out of the coma just a day or so ago, I cannot remember, and there was this great and brilliant shinning hope in all of our hearts. We were all rejoycing in the good news that she had woken up and actually tried to reach out for a stuffed animal that was in her hospital room.

Good news, I just found out she is still fighting, wait to go LJ! Our prayers and our hearts go out to you and to my brother!

So, it has been really tough for my family, even though we have never even met her. But it is because it has been so brutally hard on Brian, so our hearts have been hurting for Brian. I've never known what it's like to love someone so much that I've never ever met, or even heard her voice. I've seen a few pictures of her, but that's all, and she has captured our hearts through Brian.

Brian, our faith and prayers are stronger than ever, and even though I may not be able to express my feelings and heart as well as my brother Phillip and my mom can, I just want Brian to know that what is in my heart is pure love and faith and hope for him and LJ. I have cried quite a bit now, for you both, and I am trying more than ever to be the young woman that you believe is in me. I love you and I am doing all that I can on my part to help LJ fight the fight, so that she can come out with a BIG WIN! I love you both!
hope that none of this was inappropriate to mention at this time. If it is, please let me know and I will remove it at once! I just wanted to send out my love and thoughts as many others have already done!
To everyone in my life, I love you, all of you. Every single person that is in my life has a piece of my heart, a special spot for each and every one of you. Never forget what love is. Love is pure; it is unconditional; it is the thread that was woven to make life possible; love is never ending and is always in full, even if you feel it is empty in you, you will always find it full in another's heart; love will never abandon you, even if you forget about it and shut it out. That's what my love is to everyone in my life and to the people that are yet to be in my life. Thank you for being! You are amazing! I love you!

Emily

It's Spring Break, go figure that it's raining.

SOOOO, Spring Break is here at last! But of course, the first day we have of freedom, it's rainging and it's cold. Which also kinda stinks because our friend Bill is here from Jerome today to work on my car, but since it's rainging, we can't pull it out of the carport from him to work on.
That brings me to my next no-so-happy-thing.
There is A TON more things wrong with my car than what the people that gave it to us let on. Of course, that's probably why they gave it to us for free. Right now, I can list off a few things that are wrong, but I don't know everything because I don't know much about cars:
1. No battery!
2. Missing the black ground wire that hooks up to the battery
3. One wire is fried and we don't know what it goes to
4. The air-cleaner thing is missing and it was supposed to be there.
5. Then there is the thing that was supposed to be the only thing that needed fixing, we need to put a new transmition seal (what ever that means) in or on or however you fix a transmition seal.
6. Needs two new door handles on both front doors
7. The hatch door on the back needs a new handle or something. It doesn't look like it opens.
8. The front bumper, I just noticed today, is all cracked up and messed up.
I think that that's all that they mentioned while I was out looking at the car with my mom, dad, and Bill. I got all sad and stuff because now it seems like it will never run. I don't think it will be running for a long while, when we were hoping to have it fixed and running by the time Spring Break was over. Or at least that's what I thought the plan was. Thank goodness we didn't pay a single penny to have this car because it's probably going to take a butt-load of money to get it working. Not suprising!
So, now I am in the house, contemplating the next thing to do, which is going to be for me to go in my room and finish taking stuff down off of my walls so that we can get furniture out of my room, so that we can start painting soon. But don't worry, I am still in a cheery mood, just a little discouraged, but not torn down! Things will work out, I know it. I fought hard to get my car, so darn it, it's gonna work and it's gonna run like a dream when we're finished with it! Exedor will come back to life! And when he does, I'm gonna scream, "IT'S ALIVVVVEEE! IT'S ALIIIIIVVVEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAHHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!"
May Exedor rest in peace until it's resurection!

I found a much more positive way of thinking.

So, I pretty much feel really horrible to have said those rude things about that judge. I found it in my heart that maybe I wasn't being judged unfairly.
At my last voice lesson that I had on Thursday, I was talking to my teacher about all of it, and how unfair I thought it was that I had gotten such a low rating compared to everyone else. And I was going on with all my rants and raves about it, then we moved onto my lesson. But as I was getting ready to leave, my teacher was like, "Just keep your head up, ya know. I mean, I mad too. So just don't let it get you down." Then, when I heard her say she was mad, all of a sudden I knew I wasn't mad, at all. And a really great feeling came to me, and I said to her, "Ya know, maybe we shouldn't be mad. Maybe the 3 of us that got the Excellent ratings were luckier than the rest that got Supierior ratings. (My teacher had said earlier that she just thought it was weird that so many people has gotten Supieriors, so maybe the judges has just been too easy on them.) Because you said it was weird that they judged so easily, well maybe we're lucky that our Judge didn't. Maybe she actually cared enough to try and give us something to work off, while the other judges just didn't care, so everyone else got Supieriors that didn't really have a lot of heart and care behind them."
So, now feel so much better and much more confident about my singing because that Judge did the right thing, and really paid attetion to what I was doing. She actually JUDGED and cared about what I was doing, instead of just pretending to care, just so she could get through it fast without having to do her job. I am really greatful for having the judge that I did because she gave me something to grow off, she left plenty of room for improvement, and showed honesty instead of filling my head with thoughts that I was SUPER awesome and that I didn't ever have to worry about my singing. She actually prepared me for things that I will be in, in the future, like during college and stuff that I will have to be absolutely perfect to get a not-so-perfect rating.
SO, there you have it. I am not just some head-strong, self-centered, angry teenager that can't handle the truth. Sure, it make take me a day or two to fully understand why things happen the way they do, but I'm always looking for the right answer and don't give up until I find it. I'm not going to be satisfied with the one that I think up on my own that leaves me angry and cold hearted towards others. That's just not me. Thank goodness!
Peace brings us closer together!

Curse that STUPID judge, she doesn't know anything!

K, SO!!!!! Solo Fest. did not go so well with the whole "getting judged" and crap! I got, now prepare yourself for a complete disappointment, but I got an Excellent, NOT superior! And I got 1.5 above the lowest rating for Excellent. I got a 26.5. Now, I have been cool, calm, and collected about all of this, but really, I KNOW I, as well as the other two girls that got Excellents, deserved a superior. And this can't just be coincidence, but out of the 50 people from our school that were involved in Solo Fest., only 3 of us got an Excellent rating, and each of us had the same judge, no one else had her, I think. So, yeah. I just think we got screwed up the you-know-what with all that. So, it was pretty gay, and I know I'm good, so she can kiss my @$$! WOOT!

Anyhoo! Enough with the negative crap. I've moved on, and I still have next year to shove it in her face if she comes back (I pray she doesn't). On a happier note, I'm happy. I guess that's the only happy thing I can think of is the fact that I'm happy. Mmmm hmmm... right. Um... oh, Brian and Jenn AND Jordan are here! SUPER! I was all surprised when I saw Jordan walking into the house (Brian's son). That's another really happy thing. And Brian is fixing our computer so that gay people's crap on the internet can't give us Virus' any more. Happy Happy Happy. Um... well, I guess I should get working on my homework, or finishing it up. Love and peace!

Update on Performance Days and Dates!

Hey hey ya'll! Just a quick update to inform anyone who cares about days, dates, and times that I will be doing performances.

March 7th: 1:10 p.m. Eagle High Auditorium
March 12th: I think it's at 6:00 p.m. or around there. State St. LDS church building.
April 2nd: It's usually 6:00 (p.m.). Idaho Steelheads Building! YAY!

Okay. Some people were just wondering what some of the dates were.
I'm sooooo excited to be doing the National Anthem again for the Steelheads hockey game! This will be my 3rd year in a row singing for Fire Prevention Night! I don't know if I've already mentioned all of this, so sorry if I'm repeating myself. I just can't wait! I know I will be so much better than I was last year. I felt like last year was total disaster, but my choir teacher was there, so I was really nervous. Anyhoo! I am just so stoked about everything... except for this coming up Monday. I really hope that I do AWESOME so that the judges will give me a Supierior rating. I can't believe how nervous I am for this! Oh well.
K, I have 6 minutes until it's time to go home (I'm at school, again!) Sorry if I don't blog for a while. Our internet is ALLLLL screwed up, so I don't know when that will be up and running again.
Peace out 'till then!